Why am I
up at 2:00am
Pretending I'm perfectly
fine
Not daring to text you
but listening to music you like
Just the same. I mean,
it's not even my type
It just makes me feel like
you're here
I should be asleep but I'm
wide awake; lights on
I'm not tired, just exhausted
from replaying memories of you
And smiling at all of the
weird things you used to say
Funny how
I can barely remember to breathe
But I can remember each tap
of your agile musician's fingers
On the desk; tabletop; whatever
surface was handy
And how all I wanted each time
was to reach for your hand with mine
But I didn't
and I won't...
'Cause I can't
anymore.
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